The Islamic Journey to Motherhood... Part 1

For those of you who know, my husband and I recently had our first child. Throughout my pregnancy and even before my pregnancy, I started to learn more and more about the Islamic traditions regarding childbirth. There are so many beautiful traditions and sunnah regarding this sacred time. I decided to share a few things that I learned to other Muslimahs out there. This series will be broken down into 4 parts: Conception, During Pregnancy, Labor and Delivery and Early Infancy.

Part 1: Conception

There are many things you can do to help to conceive a child. First and most importantly, it is necessary that you and your husband are good, practicing Muslims, because this is the foundation of the family and will help you to be in the right physical and emotional state for conceiving. You should both be observing the five daily prayers, fasting, and giving zakah according to your ability. Your income and that of your husband's should be from what is permissible, and not from the haraam, such as interest, or the sale of alcohol or pork.

As far as specific du'as for conceiving, there is no "magic bullet" du'a, of course, but here are some beneficial supplications from the Holy Qur'an:

"Rabbi la tadharni faradan wa anta khayru al-warithin."

Translation: "My Lord! Leave me not solitary (childless) You are the best of inheritors." (Al-Anbiya 89)

"Rabbi hab li min ladunka dhurriyyatan tayyibah innaka sami`ud du`a'

Translation: "My Lord! Grant me from You upright offspring, for You hear all prayers" (Al `Imran 38)

Recite these du'as frequently, and also make a habit of remembering Allah throughout your day with "subhanAllah" "alhamdulillah", and "Allahu akbar" and other authentic du'as.

There are also some "worldy" things you can do to increase the chance of conception. The first is to enjoy marital intimacy frequently. A woman is only fertile for a few days out of the month, so if you are intimate often, you have a better chance to conceive. You can purchase ovulation prediction kits (which use your body's temperature to determine when you might be most fertile) and you can keep track of your menstrual cycle to determine your fertile times. Also, RELAX! Marital intimacy should be enjoyable for its own sake, and if you are enjoying one another and not stressing over "having" to get pregnant, you will actually increase your chances, as stress hormones can interfere with pregnancy. There are many stories about women who finally got pregnant after they "gave up" trying and just resigned themselves to not having children.

Make sure also that you are not doing anything that will harm your health. If either of you smokes, stop now. The toxins from tobacco products can badly affect the man's sperm, damaging it and leading to infertility and potential defects in the fetus. Eat good healthy food, avoid processed foods, and maintain a healthy body weight. Exercise moderately. You should take a good woman's multivitamin or prenatal vitamin and extra folic acid to avoid a specific birth defect. Be sure to check the ingredients for gelatin prior to purchase.

As you see, there is a lot you can do to give yourself the best chance of conceiving. One thing to caution you about: you might receive superstitious advice from family members or acquaintances. Avoid any non-Islamic advice and hold to the Qur'an and Sunnah. InshaAllah, you will be blessed with a child who will be well-mannered, beautiful, intelligent, healthy and pious.

Before intercourse, it is sunnah to recite a du'a (prayer) to protect any offspring from Shaitan (the devil) such as the following:

"Bismillāh Allāhumma jannibnash-shaytān wa jannibish-shaytāna mā razaqtanā"

Translation: In the Name of Allāh! O Allāh! Protect me from satan and protect what You bestow upon us from satan.

If this is recited prior to intercourse and a child is conceived, it is destined that Shaitan will never be able to harm it.

Once a woman has confirmed her pregnancy, she should express her gratitude before Allah Ta'ala as this is indeed a great bounty of Allah Ta'ala. Gratitude may be expressed in the following dua:

"Allahummâ Lakal Hamdû Wa Lakash-Shukru"


Translation: O Allah! All praises are due to You alone and I express my gratitude unto You alone (for granting me the honour of motherhood)

www.islamicanswers.com


Asalaamu alaikum

Najwa

Muslimah2Muslimah New Shahaadah Interview: Tahirah

In Muslimah2Muslimah's experience of reverts to Islam, we think the transitions of one's thoughts, opinions, and behavior, in fact a whole transformation of one's perspective in life is very interesting.

The negative image presented about Islam since 9-11 here in the states has really given Islam a bad name due to the media as well as people's lack of understanding. The stereotypes about the treatment of women has been rampant in the media for many years with the Taliban and other "extremist" groups. We thought it would be interesting to interview Tahirah, who in the midst of all propaganda has warmly embraced Islam and get her Muslimah's Perspective on Islam...

Muslimah2Muslimah: What is your name?

Tahirah

Muslimah2Muslimah: What made you become interested in Islam?

Tahirah: I was a new patient at a local doctor's office. I noticed that the staff were women in Niqab and Hijab! I was in awe. The office was so peaceful, and the staff was completely friendly, warm, welcoming, and professional. I was at a place in my life where I was feeling isolated, depressed, and without hope. I say this sister's to say that, seeing the staff so proudly dressed in their traditional Muslim attire, immediately made me feel less anxiety about my visit. The actual doctor came to get me in full Burqa......she welcomed me and the first thing she said after reviewing my chart was, "how do you feel about Islam?" We spoke awhile, and she told me the most powerful and life changing information about Allah's love for me. Later in my session, she gave me the Shahaadah witnessed by 3 other nurses, and gave me the name Tahirah. My life was changed forever!

Muslimah2Muslimah: What does your family think about your decision?

Tahirah: My family has been very supportive of me, and see the change in my outlook on life. They support me 100%!

Muslimah2Muslimah: What types of reactions have you gotten from your friends or coworkers?

Tahirah: My company allows for me to work from home, so not many coworkers are aware of my conversion. The ones that I have an interpersonal relationship with, however seem to pass judgement slightly. My true friends love, respect, and applaud my decision.

Muslimah2Muslimah: How has Islam changed your life?

Tahirah: In a variety of ways. The initial feeling I had after my Shahaadah was one of purity and of peace. The feeling I feel every day is that of pride, enlightenment, and fulfillment. I know a peace and love that I never have. I see life and all things in it as a blessing from Allah, and the mercy he shows me everyday. How do you explain having a blind fold on for 38 years, and all of a sudden, the sunlight presented to you? "Allah is the Protector of those who have faith: from the depths of darkness He will lead them forth into light. Of those who reject faith the patrons are the Evil Ones: from light they will lead them forth into the depths of darkness. They will be companions of the fire to dwell therein (forever)." (Qur'an: Translation of the meaning, 2:257

Muslimah2Muslimah: What advice would you give to someone who is interested in Islam?

Tahirah: I would tell them any information, notions, or previous ideals they had about Islam, completely remove from your mind. The best thing to do is utilize your local Mosque for classes and study groups offered to new converts. The Internet has great information and websites for new converts or people interested in the faith as well.

Muslimah2Muslimah: Islamically, women are required to wear a hijab. Others say that you must also cover your face(niqab). What are your thoughts on this?

Tahirah: I love Niqab and feel that the element it provides is one of complete empowerment. Similarly love Hijab, and find it odd that people see it as a sign of oppression as opposed to complete freedom, pride, and empowerment. Inshallah, I would like to eventually wear Niqab.

Muslimah2Muslimah: How did you feel the first time you wore hijab?

Tahirah:Beautiful! A makeover that beautified my inner and outer self.

Muslimah2Muslimah: What is your opinion on the common labels associated with Muslims ("terrorists", "extremists" , etc.)?

Tahirah: Whenever one is uneducated in something, and that same source is in a position of conveying information to the masses, things get distorted. It is unfortunate that society has labeled the entire Islamic way of life as "extremists and terrorists." Nothing could be further from the truth.

Muslimah2Muslimah: What is your view on the impression that many non-Muslims have that Islam oppresses the women and the women have no voice in their communities?

Tahirah: I am new to Islam, and am getting exposure daily that Muslim women posses so much strength and resolve. There is this bond and sisterhood amongst Muslimahs that is like no other! Now could an oppressed individual be that powerful?

Muslimah2Muslimah: The media tends to give very negative views on women and many non-Muslims base their views solely on this. What was your view on Islam and the treatment of women before you converted to Islam?

Tahirah: Sadly, I was very misinformed and initially had similar views.

Muslimah2Muslimah: Has your view changed in any way?

Tahirah: I am happy to say that Muslimah 2 Muslimah was my first exposure to any kind of Muslimah values and culture directly after my Shahaadah, and I learned first and foremost how prideful and empowered Muslim women feel and are!

Muslimah2Muslimah: How have has Muslimah2Muslimah helped you along your journey to Islam?/ How have you benefited from Muslimah2Muslimah?

Tahirah: Where do I begin? :o) I learned how to properly wear Hijab, new information for newly converted Muslimahs, adorable modern Muslim fashion tips and style, values of the Muslim woman, and Muslim terms. Mashallah, I will continue to learn and embrace my new faith! Al Hamdu Lilah Wa Shukru Lillah

~Insha'allah, everyone... please pray for our new sister Tahirah and welcome her into Islam by leaving her your encouragement and wisdom, insha'allah! We are very pleased with her decision as we know she is as well. Tahirah, may Allah bless you and your family in all of your endeavors and may He grant you Jannatul Firdaus! Ameen!


Asalaamu alaikum
Nadira & Najwa
Muslimah2Muslimah

Muslimah2Muslimah New Shahadah Interview: Alula!!!

In Muslimah2Muslimah's experience of reverts to Islam, we think the transitions of one's thoughts, opinions, and behavior, in fact a whole transformation of one's perspective in life is very interesting. Alula is one of our tweet buddies on Twitter and also a fellow blogger! You can check out her blog at: http://bchantae.blogspot.com/. It is called "life of an African-American Muslimah."

The negative image presented about Islam since 9-11 here in the states has really given Islam a bad name due to the media as well as people's lack of understanding. The stereotypes about the treatment of women has been rampant in the media for many years with the Taliban and other "extremist" groups. We thought it would be interesting to interview Alula, who in the midst of all propaganda has warmly embraced Islam and get her Muslimah's Perspective on Islam...

Muslimah2Muslimah: What is your name?
Alula: Alula Bruinton

Muslimah2Muslimah: What made you become interested in Islam?
Alula: In my African- American Studies class we were studying Islam. We didn't go as into-depth as I wanted to, so I studied the deen on my own. After studying the deen, I enjoyed it and made a decision to convert.

Muslimah2Muslimah: What does your family think about your decision?
Alula: In my first few months my family was not very supportive at all. A lot of my family still doesn't accept it, but my mother is getting a lot better at atleast trying to understand and accept it. Christianity is very strong in my family, I only have one muslim cousin and I see here like once every 5 years, so it's very hard for me and my family to agree on Islam.

Muslimah2Muslimah: What types of reactions have you gotten from your friends or coworkers?
Alula: My close friends and co-workers are very supportive of my decision! One of my very close friends has offered to not engage in any activitied or enviornments that I can't so that it won't be hard for me and I will feel comfortable. I'm very happy and greatful for that! I am interested to see how my other friends and classmates will react with me being the only muslimah on campus. It will be a big change for them, and that will be how I can tell who my real friends are.

Muslimah2Muslimah: How has Islam changed your life?
Alula: Being a young converted muslimah, Islam has brought me a lot of life changes. Islam has brought me so much peace and understanding. I understand Islam so much more than I understood Christianity, and I enjoy it being all about Allah and I.

Muslimah2Muslimah: What advice would you give to someone who is interested in Islam?
Alula: I would encourage them to come to Islam and study the deen and make sure they are ready to committ themselves to Allah and the deen. Islam comes with many changes for most young converters, but these changes are definately for the better!

Muslimah2Muslimah: Islamically, women are required to wear a hijab. Others say that you must also cover your face(niqab). What are your thoughts on this?
Alula: I personally prefer hijab over niqab. It took me a while to make the decision to wear hijab and get used to it, but I love hijab and I'm glad that I made the decision to wear it.

Muslimah2Muslimah: How did you feel the first time you wore hijab?
Alula: I felt good the first time I wore hijab. I did feel as though a lot of people were staring at me, but other than that, I felt great about it.

Muslimah2Muslimah: What is your opinion on the common labels associated with Muslims ("terrorists", "extremists" , etc.)?
Alula: I don't like or agree with these labels at all. Islam is a religion of peace. I know I can't change everyone's minds about their opinions, but I would like to prove people wrong about these misconceptions and open their minds to be more diverse and accepting.

Muslimah2Muslimah: What is your view on the impression that many non-Muslims have that Islam oppresses the women and the women have no voice in their communities?
Alula: I don't believe that Islam oppresses women at all. If people studied more and tried to understand and research the things they judge so much, they would have more insight on the situations and opionions they made.

Muslimah2Muslimah: The media tends to give very negative views on women and many non-Muslims base their views solely on this. What was your view on Islam and the treatment of women before you converted to Islam?
Alula: I honestly thought different from the media and negative views they had on Islam and the women. I have never had a problem with Islam or Muslims and Muslim women. I am a very open and diverse person and I love that about myself. I am in no way judgemental like the majority of the world. I still have the same thoughts and feelings after converting.

Muslimah2Muslimah: Has your view changed in any way?
Alula: Not at all. If anything my love and understanding has grown more for Islam and the muslimahs, especially the young muslimahs like myself out here in the world. We aren't perfect and it's hard in the day and age we live in to be the modest women that we are and have to be Masha'Allah.

Muslimah2Muslimah: How has Muslimah2Muslimah helped you along your journey to Islam?
Alula: Muslimah2Muslimah has helped me a lot. They've helped me strive to be a better muslimah. I never would've imagined that the Hijabi look would be for me, but I've grown into it and if I hadn't found Muslimah2Muslimah or the Muslimahs that I made friends with off the site, I would be a confused and lost muslimah. I also appreciate Muslimah2Muslimah helping me find hijabs where I live (lol), I was having the hardest time with that.

~Insha'allah, everyone... please pray for our new little sister Alula and welcome her into Islam by leaving her your encouragement and wisdom, insha'allah! We are very pleased with her decision as we know she is as well. Alula, may Allah bless you and your family in all of your endeavors and may He grant you Jannatul Firdaus! Ameen!

Muslimah2Muslimah: New Shahaadah Interview : Nahleejah

In Muslimah2Muslimah's experience of reverts to Islam, we think the transitions of one's thoughts, opinions, and behavior, in fact a whole transformation of one's perspective in life is very interesting. Nahleejah is one of our friends on our Facebook and recently became a Muslimah, alhumdulilah.

The negative image presented about Islam since 9-11 here in the states has really given Islam a bad name due to the media as well as people's lack of understanding. The stereotypes about the treatment of women has been rampant in the media for many years with the Taliban and other "extremist" groups. We thought it would be interesting to interview Nahleejah, who in the midst of all propaganda has warmly embraced Islam and get her Muslimah's Perspective on Islam...



Muslimah2Muslimah: What is your name?
Nahleejah: Nahleejah B. Anaum

Muslimah2Muslimah: What made you become interested in Islam?
Nahleehah: I loved how simple it was and how much dedication is put into it.

Muslimah2Muslimah: What does your family think about your decision?
Nahleejah: My family is really not at all close. However the ones I talk to like my step mom, dad and brother think it's great.

Muslimah2Muslimah: What types of reactions have you gotten from your friends or coworkers?
Nahleejah: Everyone is pretty much fine with it. [I] had one friend tell me she was not happy at all with my decision but she's got love for me still. She thinks I should give Jesus(PBUH) another try. Friends back home(Jersey) say Alhumdulilah(Some were born into Islam).

Muslimah2Muslimah: How has Islam changed your life?
Nahleejah: Well I've only been Muslim since April so I haven't experienced much plus I never go any where. Stuck in the house raising my two baby boys, you know doing the single mom thing. But for the most part I'm loving how simple it is, no more middle man like go[ing] through the son to get to the father. Straight to the point Me and Allah /Allah and Me.

Muslimah2Muslimah: What advice would you give to someone who is interested in Islam?
Nahleejah: I would say God/Allah is a God of peace. Islam is peaceful. God/Allah detests confusion. Islam is very simple. How confused can you get if you[r] at peace?.

Muslimah2Muslimah: Islamically, women are required to wear a hijab. Others say that you must also cover your face(niqab). What are your thoughts on this?
Nahleejah: Personally, I have no problem with either one. I choose to wear a hijab now because it's Hot I love the look. Niqab is not bad either I might wear that one day it's kind of mysterious I don't know why I like the ninja look, I love it though. I know that we wear these pieces for modesty, I feel that these pieces don't necessarily make you more modest than others. I'm sure there are some sisters who still get there flirt on with them on sadly(just keeping it real) I grew up in an Islamic community in Jersey so I've seen[it] before. It happens....
I feel that yes you should be decent and comfortable while maintaining a look that is pleasing to Allah and that doesn't have to be wearing scarves or jilbabs and such.

Muslimah2Muslimah: How did you feel the first time you wore hijab?
Nahleejah: lol wow that's a great question...Well the day before I too[k] my Shahaadah which I took on April 10th, I bought my first [khimar] at a local Islamic spot lol. I was nervous to put it on. lol I don't know why maybe It's because it was going to change my life. This hijab meant a lot, it meant that everything I was taught and built my standards on would change dramatically. I was excited and scared, I know it's a scarf, but that scarf to me meant freedom of choice and belief. I didn't wear it out the store I took it home and put it on and stood in front of the mirror looking at my self. You know it's funny as a woman your hair expresses so much of who you are whether it be short or long curly or straight real or fake lol it's your chance to let people know what your working with lol. Your outside beauty is defined on that alone, considering most people may have a prettier face than body (sadly societies thought process). Anyhoo, I stood there until I shaved that falsehood off and saw how much more beautiful I was with my hijab on. And I looked and felt STUNNING lol. I love it! It enhanced how flawless I am lol. I walked to the mail box then came back in and said to myself I could do it I could be a hijab wearing Muslimah. It's me!

Muslimah2Muslimah: What is your opinion on the common labels associated with Muslims ("terrorists", "extremists" , etc.)?
Nahleejah: Please....Islam has nothing to do with terrorism.

Muslimah2Muslimah: What is your view on the impression that many non-Muslims have that Islam oppresses the women and the women have no voice in their communities?
Nahleejah: I ask[ed] about that before I became Muslim too, I saw how women [over] seas were being treated and I swore I would never put my self in that type of environment(never say never I know lol). I did some research of my own and found that in the Quran women are highly respected.

Muslimah2Muslimah: The media tends to give very negative views on women and many non-Muslims base their views solely on this. What was your view on Islam and the treatment of women before you converted to Islam?
Nahleejah: My view on Islam hmmm...I really don't think I had any judgement on it, I respected it. I had a few questions that's all but for the most part I respected the dedication and knowledge it possessed. I was really very curious about it. I didn't realize how deep it was. I see now just how deep it is. I realize you have to be willing to learn and be open minded to see the beauty in it. Allah is beautiful Allahu akbar!

Muslimah2Muslimah: Has your view changed in any way?
Nahleejah: I just have a clear understanding on what Allah expects from us. No confusion at all.

Muslimah2Muslimah: How has Muslimah2Muslimah helped you along your journey to Islam?/ How have you benefited from Muslimah2Muslimah?
Nahleejah: It's helped very much so, it's nice to hear your perspectives on issues in Islam. We are basically the same age and some what at this time are experiencing the same issues and how you guys handle it or how other sisters handle it helps the next sister. Basically I'm not in this fight alone it's nice to have back up :o)

~Insha'allah, everyone... please pray for Sister Nahleejah & her sons and welcome her into Islam by leaving her your encouragement and wisdom, insha'allah! We are very pleased with her decision as we know she is as well. Nahleejah, may Allah bless you and your family in all of your endeavors and may He grant you Jannatul Firdaus! Ameen!

Asalaamu alaikum
Najwa & Nadira
Muslimah2Muslimah

The World is Becoming Less Christian!!!

America is a less Christian nation than it was 20 years ago, and Christianity is not losing out to other religions, but primarily to a rejection of religion altogether, a survey published Monday found.

Three out of four Americans call themselves Christian, according to the American Religious Identification Survey from Trinity College in Hartford, Connecticut. In 1990, the figure was closer to nine out of 10 — 86 percent.

At the same time there has been an increase in the number of people expressing no religious affiliation.

The survey also found that “born-again” or “evangelical” Christianity is on the rise, while the percentage who belong to “mainline” congregations such as the Episcopal or Lutheran churches has fallen.

One in three Americans consider themselves evangelical, and the number of people associated with mega-churches has skyrocketed from less than 200,000 in 1990 to more than 8 million in the latest survey.

CNN somehow manages to blame the decline in the number of Christians on the Republican Party.

Meanwhile, the percentage of Muslims has doubled since 1990 ...

United States

Through immigration and conversion, Islam is growing in the United States. Some estimates say that the number of Muslims will exceed 2 percent of the population by the year 2010. In 2005, 57% of United States residents polled viewed Muslims favorably, 22% unfavorably.

In 2005, the Council on American-Islamic Relations (CAIR) cited a 29.6 percent increase in harrassment of Muslims and an 8 percent increase in hate crimes over 2004. In 2008, CAIR reported a decrease in hate crimes, but a significant increase in civil rights violations.

During the recent US presidential campaign, Americans' attitudes toward Islam became apparent when certain people tried to label presidential candidate Barack Obama a Muslim. Most of us remember the emails that circulated accusing Obama of being a closet Muslim. Reactions to this were telling.

Obama's opponent, Senator John McCain, said he would vote for a Muslim if the person was a qualified candidate, however, John McCain's pastor, Rod Parsley, claimed that Islam is a "conspiracy of spiritual evil." A patter of similar villifications created a negative background noise to the entire campaign.

Colin Powell, a former US Army general and Secretary of State under President George W. Bush, said during his endorsement of Barack Obama for president, as a response to the attempt to label Obama a Muslim, "Is there something wrong with being Muslim in this country? The answer is no." Reaction to Mr. Powell's endosement and remarks was predictably split along party and liberal vs. conservative lines, indicating that Americans are still divided in their views about Islam.

Europe

According to the BBC, because of immigration and a higher-than average birth rate, the Islamic population in Europe is growing rapidly, and Islam is Europe's fastest growing religion. In western Europe, the population averages less than 5 percent of the overall population whereas in some eastern European countries Muslims make up 40 percent or more of the population.

According to the Pew Global Attitudes Project, western Europeans regard Christians, Jews, and Muslims twice as unfavorably as Great Britain, the United States and Canada. All in all, the western European attitude toward Muslims is right around 50/50: half favorable and half unfavorable.

Because Islamic immigrants form a cohesive, separatist entity within the host country, Europeans are concerned that Muslims will not integrate into their society. In particularly secularist states such as France, Germany and the Netherlands, this can be a source of conflict, as illustrated by the fact that more than 50 percent of those polled in each of these three countries favor banning Muslim head scarves in public schools.

There is a feeling among some Europeans that immigrants are being given civil rights over and above that of the natives.

The Middle East

According to the Pew Global Attitudes Project, Middle Eastern countries overwhelmingly favor Islam and look unfavorably upon Christians and very unfavorably upon Jews.

In Israel, about one in six citizens is Muslim, comprising about 16 percent of the population - a higher percentage than most European countries. Israel was not polled by the Pew Global Attitudes Project, and a thorough search did not yield statistics on Israeli feelings toward Islam, pro or con. About 35 Israelies convert to Islam every year. A New York Times Magazine article bore witness that Jewish Israeli youngsters harrass Muslim youngsters in West Bank settlements.

China and Indonesia

About fifty percent of people polled in China expressed an unfavorable view of all religions. Ninety-nine percent of Indonesians polled expressed a favorable view of Islam, while 76 percent expressed an unfavorable view of Jews, and 38 percent were unfavorably disposed toward Christians.

As part of the pre-Olympics clean-up in the spring of 2008, China accused their tiny Muslim minority of conspiring to commit terrorist acts, but no evidence was presented to validate this claim.

Indonesia is like a Middle Eastern country in its disposition toward religions. Therefore it is decidedly pro-Islam.

Russia

Russia has the most favorable view of Christians among those nations polled, and a favorable outlook on Jews, but a split view of Islam that is echoed everywhere but in the Middle East. Fifty-five percent of those polled viewed Islam favorably whereas 36 percent view Islam unfavorably. Similar percentages appear across the globe.

Freed from Soviet repression, Islam is blossoming in Russia. But ethnic Russians view the growth of Islam with worry that they are losing their national identity. This feeling, too, is echoed across the globe.

-Tom Rubenoff